2:32am

geometricdeathtrap:

metallikato:

generallegendary:

metallikato:

jewelstaites:

how to give a good handjob

• bop it
• pull it
• twist it

• harder
• better
• faster
• stronger 

You pull your left hand in
You pull your left hand out
You pull your left hand in
And you shake it all about!

Cha cha real smooth

none of you ever touch a penis

2:20am

nuclearsoup:

you know what? i do. thank you for pointing that out

(Source: vulcanist)

2:18am

jerkenglish:

when people send me dumb asks out of no where

(Source: grandpaharleys)

2:16am

squee-worthy-fandoms:

thewalkingassbutt:

cumber-porn:

karz4kidz:

bittergrapes:

faeiouck:

MY SISTER JUFT SHOEWED ME THIS AND I CAN”T STOP FREAKIN ABOUT IT

LIKE THIS GIRL IS A FUCKIN DEMON OR SOMEIHTGN

JUST WATCH IT

I have lost faith in physics

what on this fucking earth

wtf!! how??

*throws holy water*

gymnasts, man….

2:15am

slydig:

lovemenowtill4ever:

slydig:

who would name their kid zoey 101 

Uhm……that was her room number not part of her name

why would her room number be zoey 

2:15am

minuiko:

another self-indulgent sketch

2:15am

womenandcats:

By Jayne Steiger

(Source: magicalteatime)

0:27am

thedoctorsconsultingfirebender:

I want the Doctor to take a kid as his companion.

A 14-15 year old kid who’s parents are fighting, has few friends, bad grades, and feels like complete shit before the Doctor comes.

No kissing, complicated relationships, confusion or stuff like that, just the Doctor taking a kid who doesn’t see much out of life for a ride.

2:09am

nikoniko808:

“Good morning sweetie…<3”

“Heh… mornin’…”

OH NOS MY HAND SLIPPED…

1:29am

92x:

audreyhorne-cooper:

Amy Winehouse after hearing she has just won her first Grammy (2008)

(Source: poiszon)

1:28am

ship-all-the-gay:

so i was eating some of those sugary gross conversation hearts. (they were on for $1 at work) and I was reading them.

they say like ‘cool’ and ‘ur cute’ and then suddenly

I think the factory workers need help

1:26am

stickinemwithpointyendsandlace:

ladyshebear:

feelingsdealer:

“I should get home actually”

Well f#ck!

“Judging by statistics on women who join religious orders, career chastity seems to be losing ground in today’s world.”

Wat?

“By then the others were dismounting as well, and grooms were coming forward for their mounts.”

Guess I’m going to have a good year.

1:26am

so-relatable:

Yahoo is trying to buy tumblr. Reblog if you are against this!

1:26am

dinnerpartydan:

That awkward moment when you ran up the stairs and now you’re trying to hide your heavy breathing like it’s no big deal but you’re actually pretty winded and dear god you need to work out.